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How To Make Your Marriage Feel Brand New

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"Tingly" by Jason Kotecki. Prints available here. I recently read a pretty incredible assessment of marriage. It was written by my friend Scott, who was reacting to the habit our culture has of framing marriage as the end of freedom. Acquiring the ball and chain. Hitched. Tied down. Game over. Refreshingly, Scott countered with this: “Marriage is the ultimate form of freedom. Freedom to be our true selves, freedom to let our guards down and be vulnerable, and freedom to fart as loudly as possible without being judged. When I was single and struggling to find someone to share my life, exhausting activities like resenting and pretending and impressing took up its of space in my heart...But the moment we tied the knot, all of that vanished. Suddenly I was released from the prison of having to prove myself." I couldn’t agree more. One of the neat things about being married is being able to really know another person on a deep level. There is a sense of comfortability and a freedom …

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Debbie Green, May 2018 Adultitis Fighter of the Month

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An Adultitis Fighter is someone who rallies against rules that don't exist and engages in ruthless, senseless acts of silliness that undermine Adultitis and its unadventurous version of adulthood. Once a month, we shine a light upon the most remarkable among us, holding them up as a dazzling example of what we should strive for in this epic battle against a formidable enemy. Don’t let her petite frame fool you, Debbie Green is a giant when it comes to JOY. She is filled with it and it shines generously for all to receive. She’s a giver. Her example of joyful living fills those around her with encouragement and hope. What a gift it is to know her. To date, Debbie has attended ALL five of our Escape Adulthood Summits and every time she spreads her joy, reminding us all of the importance of not taking ourselves too seriously. She’s spunky, constantly smiling, a devoted teacher and nurse, and absolutely adores her children and husband. In recognition of their efforts, Adultitis …

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When Your Life Feels a Little Off, Try This

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When I’m working on a painting, I have to step back from time to time. I have to literally stop the activity of painting and be still before the work. You might think it slows down the process. What it really does is help me make better paintings. Otherwise, I can’t see the painting through the brushstrokes. If I don’t step away every so often, I’m liable to get stuck overdoing part of the painting and end up ruining the whole thing. Giving myself some distance helps me notice things I can’t see when I’m up close. I can examine the overall composition, the balance of color, and if the values are working well together. If I get a feeling that something’s not quite right, stepping back and taking a look at the big picture can help me pinpoint the problem. Sometimes, I simply step back to admire what I’ve created. One of my favorite parts of making art are the moments of pride I have when something turns out so well that I can hardly believe I did it. The same is true of our …

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How to Change the World Even if You’re Not an Avenger

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"I've Got Sunshine" by Jason Kotecki. Prints available here. I want to change the world. I want to make a dent in the universe. I want my legacy to last for generations after I die. Talk about an oversized ego. I believe that my motives are pure, but the trouble is, I often forget that the best way to change the world is in simple ways, starting today. After all, even if the sun is shining outside, we encounter people every day who are in the middle of a dark time. My wife is great at taking advantage of the small ways she can bring light into the lives of people around her. Her thoughtuflness results in small actions, but they make a real impact. Baking Valentine’s Day brownies for a widow next door. Sending a funny gif to a friend having a rough day. Complimenting and engaging in a meaningful conversation with the grocery delivery guy. These small rays of sunshine don’t generate standing ovations or front-page headlines, but they might be more meaningful. And they …

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Becoming a Professional Giver

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"Glorious Purpose" by Jason Kotecki. Prints available here. A professional giver. I’m not sure it's something anyone aspires to when they are a little kid. A professional athlete or musician? Sure. But a professional giver? Is that even a thing? I first heard the term last year from my mentor, Noah, who was challenging Kim and me to take things to the next level. We've had a pretty good run of success with our business, and he invited us to to take a wider view. He encouraged us to begin looking at ourselves as professional givers. The premise is to start thinking of it as your job to give away as much money as you can, then plan (and act) accordingly. Now, I started this business for two reasons. I wanted to make a living doing what I loved, and I wanted help as many people as I could while doing it. No one was putting out want ads for artists looking to help people recapture their childlike spirit, so my options were limited. It took an enormous amount of faith to start …

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Something New to Try in the Bedroom

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"Fork & Spoon" by Jason Kotecki. Prints available here. I’ve been married for almost 18 years. Every single night that I’m at home, I sleep on the right side of the bed. Why? How did that come about? I don’t ever remember having a discussion about it with Kim, and yet, here we are; our assigned spots have not changed since the day we got hitched. Weird. Why do we do any of the things we do? The little habits that make up our days, where did they come from? Which way do you take to work? How do you typically run your meetings? On-board new employees? Welcome new customers? Deal with angry ones? What's the first thing you do when you get out of bed in the morning? How do you acknowledge the birthdays of the special people in your life? What kind of cookies do you make for Christmas? We have too many things to think about and process in a given day, so we help ourselves out by putting a lot of the routine stuff on autopilot. The problem is that we rarely re-evaluate …

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