How to Avoid the Dark Side of Metamorphosis

Have you ever gone through a major metamorphosis?

Are you in the middle of one right now?

Metamorphosis was the “word of the week” on Sesame Street this week. [Side note: I love how Sesame Street talks UP to kids, challenging them to not only say a five syllable word, but also to understand the meaning. Very cool!]

As Elmo explained to Abby in his screechy, glass-shattering voice, “It’s a B–I–G change!” Tadpoles transforming into frogs and caterpillars turning into a butterflies were given as examples. As I heard this theme echoed over and over throughout the episode, I couldn’t help but think about how metamorphosis is not limited to amphibians or insects.

Life is filled with B-I-G changes that require major transformations of self:

• Death of a child
• New career
• Divorce
• Personal Injury
• Addiction
• Death of spouse
• Illness
• Bankruptcy

These are the B-I-G ones — the ones that you simply CANNOT escape without being transformed, hopefully for the better. These are also some of the biggest sources of Adultitis you can find.

I feel like my transformation into motherhood was definitely a metamorphosis. It’s safe to say that I am a much different person than I was 19 months ago. I knew having a child would be a B-I-G adjustment in my life, but I definitely underestimated how much I would change as a person. I find myself much more compassionate and forgiving of others. I am also more strict about time management and protective of family time. Becoming a mom has been what I would call a “Butterfly Moment,” when a major change brings you to a new and improved self.

But it doesn’t always end so positively.

Last week we went to Star Wars in Concert. (Crazy good, btw!) When they featured a vignette on Anakin Skywalker I couldn’t help but notice that he, too, went through a B-I-G change. He transformed from a wide-eyed boy into an angst-ridden Jedi knight, ultimately evolving into the infamous Darth Vader. Not exactly a Butterfly Moment, but a metamorphosis nonetheless. Maybe Anakin’s metamorphosis is more like that of a bitter frog — regretful and resentful of everything and everyone.

Life as you know it can completely morph in a matter of seconds. One phone call and your entire reality can be turned upside down in an instant.

When life’s circumstances bring you to an opportunity metamorphosis, how will your transformation look at the end of it all? Will you create a Butterfly Moment or a Bitter Frog Moment?

Will you be angry and resentful that you can’t breathe under water anymore or thrilled about all of the adventures you’ll experience now that you’re released from your cocoon and can fly?

The choice is up to you. Avoid the dark side! Instead of blaming the circumstances that brought you to this place of transformation, own the fact that an Adultitis-free attitude can help you through it one day at a time. Hold on to the hope that some way, somehow, you’ll emerge stronger and more beautiful than ever.

And may the force be with you.