I find it somewhat perplexing that babies don’t come with instruction manuals. I mean, a little digital clock that I got with my subscription to Fast Company even came with a little sheet of directions, printed in many different languages (but not in Pig Latin, unfortunately.) And yet, even though raising a child is probably the most important undertaking a human being could ever be charged with, a microwavable burrito comes with more instructions than a baby.
Indeed, a quote from Harold B. Lee states, “The most important work you and I will ever do will be within the wall of our own homes.” (Your hour-long appearance on Trading Spaces not withstanding.)
I know that there are a gajillion books on the market – my friend Jaimie has read almost all of them, and half of them tell you to do one thing while the other half recommends the complete opposite action – but there needs to be a clear-cut standard issue that comes with every new kid. And even though the Bible has a lot of good parenting advice, I think God could have done us all a favor by replacing Leviticus with some sort of gospel of Parenting.
Now mind you, I know everything about parenting. All non-parents do.
Maybe someday I will write this much-needed book of wisdom, but for now, I shall share a top 10 list my father-in-law first shared with me. In a survey to one hundred 8th graders, the students were asked the question, “What do you think the qualities of an ideal parent would be?” Surprisingly, unlimited allowance did not make the list:
1. Spend more time with me.
2. Listen.
3. Allow my privacy.
4. Remember I’m growing up.
5. Trust–let me earn it.
6. Give me more responsibilities – then notice when I’m responsible.
7. Be more patient.
8. Don’t go ballistic when I do something stupid.
9. Be more forgiving.
10. Love me.
I think that’s a pretty good list to start with. It will at least buy all of you parents out there time while I put together my Idiot’s Guide to Parenting.
I just need to make sure I get it all down on paper before I actually have kids and it becomes immediately outdated…
It does change a bit once you have kids. Mine’s only 1 and a bit, and already I’m learning that everything changes once you have a real live person with their own personality to deal with…
btw – cool site, I love the idea of dodging adulthood. I’m 23 and trying my best to avoid it :)
Okay, they do come with a funny owner’s manual. They only thing is you have to buy it seperately. Isn’t that usually the truth. Here is a link: http://www.amazon.com/dp/1931686238/?tag=kimandjason
I think this book should be a MUST for ANY expecting parent and especially a MUST BUY for ANY SHOWER.
Also, on a more serious note, some school districts offer a Teachers as parents program free if you are within their district. Ours is called Early Beginnings and New Beginnings. They have play groups, you are able to talk to other parents about their parenting styles and share stories. They also offer screenings to see how your child is developing. If he/she need assistance in speaking or hearing, etc. they will get you the help you need before they enter into Kindergarten. Our program also offers classes free to the parents within their district and they can recieve college credit while they learn. They have classes anywhere from “The importance of Play time” – “Sibling Rilvary”, don’t forget there are ways to discipline your child. To learn more or see if it’s available in your area, visit the link: http://www.parentsasteachers.org
Hope this helps anyone. But remeber, you are the only one that TRULY KNOWS YOUR CHILD AND THEIR LIMITS.
– Renée