I admit it. I’m a sucker for those “kids say the darndest things” lists. And I’m not too shameful to admit that I can’t wait to have kids just so I can hear some original stuff firsthand.
My friend Marilyn sent me a list entitled, “Angels Explained By Children.” With the Hollywood writers’ strike going on, maybe producers should just hire kids; the stuff they come up with is often funnier than the pros.
The cool thing is that most of the times kids say something funny, they’re not trying to be.
It’s not easy to become an angel! First, you die. Then you go to Heaven, and then there’s still the flight training to go through. And then you got to agree to wear those angel clothes.
Every time hear or read something funny said by a child, I am reminded by how differently they see the world. And I wish and I strive to think that way too. Why? Well for one, children are clearly the best unintentional comedians in the world.
Angels talk all the way while they’re flying you up to heaven. The main subject is where you went wrong before you got dead.
My guardian angel helps me with math, but he’s not much good for science.
They are the best brainstormers because they’re not afraid to look silly while proposing a hypothesis.
When an angel gets mad, he takes a deep breath and counts to ten. And when he lets out his breath, somewhere there’s a tornado.
Angels have a lot to do and they keep very busy. If you lose a tooth, an angel comes in through your window and leaves money under your pillow. Then when it gets cold, angels go south for the winter.
And they have an innocence and other-worldly wisdom about them that helps them shed slivers of truth on the most complicated mysteries of the human experience.
Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and pets. And if they don’t make the animals get better, they help the child get over it.
My angel is my grandma who died last year. She got a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth.
Part of what makes the stuff that comes out of the mouths of babes funny is their limited access to facts. Sometimes I think we could benefit from the same “disadvantage.” How great would it be if, from time to time, we could unlearn what we already know? It’s impossible to calculate how many more breakthroughs we’d see. Because they don’t have all the “facts” suggesting that something can’t be done, kids are more likely to come up with new solutions to old “unsolvable” problems. Just think: how would politics look (or our schools, our health care system, etc.) if people who proposed solutions weren’t drowned out by hordes of status quo fact police saying something can’t be done?
If you want to accomplish anything of significance, you’re going to need to look at things in a new way — with the preposterous curiosity of a child. And you’ll need to prepare yourself for the inevitable onslaught of naysayers.
After all, despite the skepticism of billions of people that came before them, Orville and Wilbur Wright had the audacity to believe that man could fly. What a silly proposition that was.
All angels are girls because they gotta wear dresses and boys didn’t go for it.